yeeeowch. It's morning...

It's been a while since I've felt this effected by day light savings. *Blink* One beer and lack of sleep have me typing like a small blogging sea lion (just flippers, no fingers). Speaking of sea lions...

- Lovely night! Ran pre-travel errands, bought house-sitter food (thanks, Tim! :) ), exercised, and then off to a Bingo cast party. Michelle totally spoiled us, and it was full of conversation about houses and kids and life, but the houses and kids and lives of some amazingly funny people. It was great.

- Rick and Ahna were there! Wonderful! (Ahna reads my blog! This makes me so happy. ...Ahna.. I have found your's. It's wonderful. Yea!.. and yes. California sounds fabulous. I'm totally in... :) )

- Sober and full of good food and company, I headed to the Workshop for the heck of it. They were awesome enough to let me play set - - thanks, guys! It was super fun. (and sea lions are funny. :)) More favorite people seen.

- To the Mill!

- To drop Harry off! (yea Harry!)

- To suddenly find it's after 3 a.m.!? What?! No! .. I should have known.

I woke up with "HOW do I fly to Portland?" in my mind (i.e. travel being not quite real yet.) First, I pack. Then, I go eat lunch with good people. Then, I have youth rehearsal. Then, I have rehearsal. Then, you ask Steph really really nicely if she can pick you up in Uptown. Then, you go to the Airport. And suddenly, you're in Portland. Supposedly, it's just that easy. Magically, you end up at the Airport, take off your shoes, and some great poobah transports you to another world (i.e. Oregon). I hope I sleep tonight, cuz I can feel the lack of sleep hiding behind my eyelids.

I'm trying to figure out how to deal with a state of 32-year old emo-ness: to not just shove this emo-ness away, but actually deal with it. Dealing with it sucks (right now, it just means letting myself be "in that space" of emo-ness. bllleeeeaaaghhhhh..) For this week, my life philosophy has been to try and treat myself as a boy. It's a horribly horribly un-feminist way to think - - but it's helping me through for some reason. If I think of myself as a boy (as in, what would a boy do in this situation? What would a boy do to get what he wants?), somehow that cuts down on the pining and being-lonely that my brain and heart are doing. It's backwards and, again, incredibly un-feminist (and my one women's studies class is in the back of brain, chanting that the patriarchy has won... well.. yes... duh, women's studies class. At least for now.), but it's actually giving me some space for perspective. Yeeargh. Stupid boys and your perceived perspective.... Im n ur brain, steeln ur paytreearrkey. okthxbai!

Wish me luck, wish us luck, and luck back to you too.

Onward.